I grew up around animals, so it was always natural for me to have them around. Actually I never even knew a life without pets could exist. They started off small - fish, hamster, bird and then moved onto bunnies, kittens and dogs. So really it wasn't that unusual the day I came across an elephant and decided to bring him home.
I led him home by his chain and then attached him to a stake in my yard. We got along swimmingly at first - everyone thought it was the coolest thing! It is so easy looking after an elephant - no work at all. The only thing that is beginning to bother me is the dung he leaves in the front yard. I have decided to walk carefully around it, and I don't notice a thing. It is beginning to stink, and there seem to be more flies than usual in my front yard. I can't wait for winter.
Thank goodness winter is here. The ground is finally frozen. The flies are gone, and now I can just walk over the dung to get in and out of my house.
Spring is coming and the ground is starting to thaw, I think I will work from home for a few weeks until things dry up a bit outside. A neighbour has agreed to send me food packets across the way through our windows. Things are working well.
I noticed the brown stuff is starting to build up around the bottoms of the windows. I am sick of looking outside and only seeing brown. When did the view get so awful. I was surfing online and found these pictures you can glue over your window pain to change the view. Imagine any view you want! I can't wait to get them.
I have stopped receiving food deliveries, the smell was too bad when I opened my window. I have also resorted to wearing a close pin over my nose. Life is starting to go downhill. What happened to my wonderful life. Nobody comes to visit anymore. I am starting to get depressed, What am I going to do.
Today a friend stopped by with a shovel. She told me it would help my problems. I don't know how a shovel will fix my problems. Can I eat a shovel? NO. Can A shovel keep me company? NO. Does a shovel smell pretty? NO. I took the shovel and stuffed it in the corner.
The friend called me up to ask how the shovel was working. Not well at all I said. All it does is sit in the corner and look at me. You have to actually use it she said. Use it... for what I asked? To shovel the elephant dung she replied. Why would I want to do that I asked? I can't even get out of my house I replied. Exactly! she said. So I picked up the shovel and got to work. 10 days later and I had a path from my front door to the sidewalk.
My friend called back and asked how I liked the shovel. Not at all I said. Well don't you enjoy being able to leave your house she asked? Yes, but no thanks to the shovel I replied. 10 days of back breaking labor was what it took. Besides your shovel still never fixed the smell, no one comes to visit me and I am still hungry because I no longer have money to by food after not working for so long.
And so the story continues...
The moral of the story... Get rid of the elephant and then get the proper tools to help you get your yard cleaned up and your life back together.
The Elephant represents years of poor dietary choices, and the shovel is alternative medicine. When trying to get healthy or slim - get rid of the source of your crap and then start to clean up the mess. Alternative medicine and healthy lifestyle choices are still a lot of work, but they represent the shovel. It is a tool to help you repair the damage that has been done by poor (dietary) choices. It is not meant to overcome the effects of having an elephant in your front yard in the first place.
PS The plastic picture window coverings represent pharmaceuticals and diet schemes. They mask the problem by hiding and disguising the symptoms. Fine, if you are content to never leave your house and spend your live viewing the outdoors through a plastic picture. But perhaps you want more out of life... The choice is yours.